Every time I tried, I get tongue-tied

Thou shall remember this date for it is of utmost importance. 

What did you say?

Nevermind.

Anyway, as I was saying, and as you can see from the retarded photo, I got myself retainers fixed (I’m not even sure why I sound excited about this)!

*Just in case you're mentally challenged: Retainers are NOT braces. If you must know, they are the youthful and less embarrassing form of dentures, able to be taken off for meals or cleansing.

It’s not as painful as I thought it would be; in fact, it’s not even close to painful, just discomfort at having something in your mouth 24/7, like chewing on a magic cookie all day long. The only annoying thing is the saliva. God, it’s like my mouth's saliva bladder got busted or something. I keep sucking it back the whole time, as if I’m lusting over the person I talk to and can’t keep my drooling in check. Haha. When I skyped Eu Chern, he couldn’t understand a word I said so I had to take the retainers off, which I did in front of the camera, before his naked eyes, much to his disgust. I even tweaked it with my finger absent-mindedly, sometime during the video call, and I was running it across the part where the frame jutted out and poked against my lips when a voice boomed, or yelled, in my headphones, "EWWW CAN YOU NOT FREAKING DO THAT IN FRONT OF THE CAMERA!" Haha right. I forgot all about the webcam.

Oh. And the dentist gave me this wiry mystic key that turns a secret lock in my retainers, a ritual and an act of wizardry I must perform unfailingly at the start of every week in achieving straight and beautiful teeth. Plus, it was presented to me in this fairylike glow-in-the-dark horse shoe-shape box! Ha.Who's laughing now, Tham Ying Ying?!

But 12 months IS a long time, all factors considered. Let's just hope the retainers is the only aid I need and that it would accomplish what it was molded to do; that I would not need to turn to, oh God, braces.

I should definitely stop smiling like that.